Dear Erin:
To put it simply, you are scared andĀ you are stuck being scared, stuck in fear.
It is scaryĀ to moveĀ forward, it is scary to stay whereĀ you are, so what-to-do?
Got to lessen that fear, that is firstĀ priority, somethingĀ that has to be done, otherwise you can’t move past this fear trap. Is quality psychotherapy available to you? Have you tried guided meditations (theme of mindfulness is best)? Any social support, people whose presenceĀ calms you?
Another question: is there anyone who is financially dependentĀ on you?
anita