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Not getting invested in what I can't control

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  • June 2, 2018 at 3:47 am #210451
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Evie:

    What an interesting thread: you brought up an issue and resolved it, all in your original post. I have nothing to add. Except maybe this:

    You wrote, “every nasty, venal, aggressive and narcissistic person I’ve ever known or known of suddenly seems to having their day in the sun.” You have an example of a woman who advances her career acting in such nasty, venal, aggressive ways.

    In my experience, a lot of aggressive, abusive people do not get their day in the sun and do not benefit financially from their behavior. Only a minority of them do. Most lead dysfunctional lives, not benefiting from their behavior outside temporary emotional relief and feel-good moments.

    anita

     

    June 6, 2018 at 11:02 pm #211333
    Evie
    Participant

    Thank you.  I think you’re right.  People who act like that seem to be pretty miserable, ultimately.  They have to live with themselves, and they are very, very unhappy.  They’re also pretty damaged.  I don’t think people who aren’t damaged have any desire to act that way.  As the saying goes, “Hurt people hurt people.”  That said, the fact that someone is acting out of damage doesn’t mean that I don’t get to draw boundaries when appropriate — that’s something I’m still working on.

     

    June 7, 2018 at 6:14 am #211375
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Evie:

    You are welcome. Is there a person like this in your family, a parent maybe, who is one of the Hurt-people-hurting-others, specifically, hurting you somehow?

    anita

    June 7, 2018 at 6:15 am #211377
    Anonymous
    Guest

    * didn’t reflect under Topics

    June 21, 2018 at 2:33 pm #213515
    StealthInfosecProgrammer
    Participant

    Hi Evie! Are you a nurse by any chance…?

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