I’m proud of myself today. I said no to my boss about taking on a new position at work. The position my boss was suggesting I take over wasn’t something of personal interest, and was high pressure so I could foresee it coming with a lot of stress. It wasn’t right for me. I didn’t offer any apologies or excuses, I just told my boss I wasn’t comfortable taking on that type of role.
I’m a people pleaser, and my instinctive reaction is to do whatever people ask me to maintain an image of myself and avoid disappointing. But this attitude is something I have been working to overcome. So saying no to an authority figure is a big achievement for me. I’ve read lots of great articles on the blog on this site that have been really helpful in this process.
I’ve been on a bit of an emotional journey these last few months. Our 3 dogs passed away in rather quick succession. Horse developed cancer and we had him put to sleep when medication wasn’t effective as we didn’t want him in any pain. Jack was old and we’d been bracing to lose him soon, he then developed geriatric seizures and we had him put to sleep as treatment could do more harm than good at his age. Bertie we came home from work to find her dead-very big shock.
A couple of weeks ago my Great Aunt was diagnosed with cancer, and it had progressed too far for treatment. She passed away peacefully in hospital over Easter. I had been there visiting family at the time, so was able to support them and help with funeral.
I feel like there’s been a lot of loss and that’s really challenging, I don’t always understand the different feelings I get but it really pushes me towards positive growth too. Like it helps me reflect on what’s of personal importance, and gives me more strength to make changes I need to.