- This topic has 4 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 4 months ago by
Mark.
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July 6, 2017 at 9:48 am #156640
ManuelParticipantHi, I’m 33 years old and I really feel no matter what I do there isn’t a point in doing it, I feel it goes nowhere and lately thoughts of giving up are popping in my head…
So you readers have some context I’ll explain where I come from and how I ended up where I am.
I’m from Venezuela, if you guys don’t know is a pretty messed up country in south america… Well I was doing great started working at age 15 and ended up with a great career by the time i was 21… when i was 21 i was travelling all over the continent because of work, USA, CANADA, MEXICO, ARGENTINA, you name it, i was there…
But then i was laid off… it took me about a week to find a job but it was something dull but with a good pay… 2 years later i was back at the top… the year was 2012 and i was hired a CISO of a Big Bank in Venezuela… this was sweet… money was good, i was doing great with my girlfriend everything seemed great. But… living in Venezuela even for a position that high in a bank you can’t afford to buy a house or even rent an apartment, so i was living in my parents house, but still i was happy, but there it started… that feeling, i was 28 at that time, and after 13 years of working i’ve had a 10 year old car… that was my acomplishments… couldnt finish my university because i had to work and that inflation killed my finances so hard i just couldnt pay more university, so that is sitting there for me to course 1 more semester and thats it.
Anyways overall i still could live my life happy, modest but it was OK… until December 2013 where my girlfriend soon to be wife got mugged… I took a decision and said i’m not taking it anymore and decided to migrate, legally of course.
August 2014 me and my wife migrated to Bogota, Colombia. Luckily for me, I encountered and old boss of mine and we partner up and started a company of information security, and boy the roller coaster started its been 3 years and more than saying is a tough market it’s an all lies market, which has made it really hard to make a living here… right now i have 3 employees and every month is a struggle to get them payed but still I’m managing and is working out… but in those 3 years i have nothing… just a rent i pay every month because even my stuff like fridge, bed, dining table, etc… were all gifts… sure i took a debt to start the company but still i owe like 80% of it, so I’m getting this feeling again where no matter how hard i work, i just go nowhere is like I’m not moving at all… so the first thoughts i had were give up… leave everything go back to Venezuela and live at your parents house, you wont move there but at least you’ll be in a comfortable zone, it’s a mess, and I’m worried now because I’m starting to think whats the point… I lost the point in life why should I do anything at all if it’s just going to be exactly the same… which made me think of just go ahead and live in the street without a worry. I’m not going to kill myself because i think is stupid, but really i’m loosing what is the point of even living… I try to be as good as possible but nothing seems to turn this way for the better or if it has i’m not seeing it… all i know is i feel more stressed and worried now than 4 years ago…
I can thank a lot of things, I have a great Wife, but i can talk with her about this… she’s going through her process as well and is worst because she hasn’t found a job in almost 2 years, so i try to support her the best way i can, but i know is not always the best way.
I have a great daughter… she is 1 year old and is amazing…
So the pressure on me is greater… is not me anymore, is all the 3 of us… I see a lot of people do whatever they want and their happy… and to be honest i was like that… i don’t know if the problem is me… or is south americas economy that is going to hell faster than a cannonball…
I don’t know i just feel like nothing has a meaning anymore and i’m tired of feeling like that.
Thanks.
July 6, 2017 at 11:36 am #156684
AnonymousGuestDear Manuel:
Wikipedia’s entry about the economy in Venezuela reads: “According to The Heritage Foundation and the Wall Street Journal, Venezuela has the weakest property rights in the world, scoring only 5.0 on a scale of 100; expropriation without compensation is not uncommon…”- so no, I wouldn’t say that the problem in your economic situation there (not being able to rent or own a home regardless of your hard work and salary) was you (“i don’t know if the problem is me” you wrote).
You migrated to Colombia. Wikipedia reads in the economy section: “in recent years growth has been impressive, reaching 6.9% in 2007, one of the highest rates of growth in Latin America…Colombia is now one of only three economies with a perfect score on the strength of legal rights index, according to the World Bank.” So, I can see why you chose Colombia. But a 6.9% growth does not mean, of course, that it applies to individual economic growth, it is a statistic.
“Feeling like nothing I do has a meaning”- you don’t see the financial benefits to your hard work that you would like, I understand that. And the solution that comes to your mind is to go back to Venezuela and live with your parents or “live in the street without a worry”- in other words, your solution is to make your life more difficult.
You can’t live in the streets without a worry. It doesn’t work that way. Plenty of worries living on the street.
Better be another solution, at least an attempt for a better solution. Try to make your life better, not worse. See what it is that you can change for better return-on-investment of your working time and energy. If there is a way to work smarter, not harder, do so.
I hope you post again with your thoughts and feelings.
anita
July 7, 2017 at 8:13 am #156812ManuelParticipantThanks for the response.
Part of my frustration it is finances… but i don’t know… the information that you took from Wikipedia although is some accurate is not that exact… for example it doesn’t tell you that in the last 3 years Colombia had an indirect inflation of 87% and that the taxes were raised beginning this year…
Either way I kinda need to find a balance again… I didn’t care about money before, but I do now, maybe is the pressure of having a daughter now and that constant worry to keep her safe…
I know I’m not entirely making sense… but is helping me to vent stuff…
July 7, 2017 at 10:18 am #156852AnonymousGuestDear Manuel:
You are welcome, and thank you for your input regarding the possible inaccuracy or lack of completeness in Wikipedia’s entry on Colombia (I only read a small part of the entry, therefore I use “possible” inaccuracy).
You are there, you know what is going on. I do hope you post anytime, as long as it helps you to vent. I hope life gets better for you, your wife and daughter!
anita
July 8, 2017 at 4:14 pm #157092
MarkParticipantHi Manuel,
Don’t let your financial problems let you forget how lucky you are. A wife and a child is sort of the pinnacle of some people’s dreams. If your business is struggling then perhaps you can look for a second job or even another career as you decide what you want to do with the business. Perhaps you can take the lessons you learned from this venture and start fresh. Or you could find another job that you love and let’s you go home feeling happy at the end of the day. Create meaning, create possibilities for yourself. Focus on hope and progress instead of everything that is going wrong. You can even decide on the thing that is bothering you the most, and then create a list of steps that will help you move past it. Then you can choose the next goal, and the next goal. Decide the person who you want to become and move closer toward that person each day.
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