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July 20, 2016 at 11:50 am #110154
Kimberly GuelParticipantHi there,
Congratulations on landing the job!
To start, I’m an expert at second guessing myself and talking myself out of all sorts of great ideas. I am good at motivating others, however.
Have you tried making a pros and cons list between staying where you are or taking the new position? I think the number one thing to think about is whether you’re happy right now. If you’re not completely fulfilled, this could be the opportunity that can be the answer to that yearning. I know it’s terrifying – I’m still trying to figure out my calling! Think about what the change of scenery could do for you as well. This might even be the stepping stone you need. I say go for it! You’re an expert and passionate regarding your craft – this will shine if you take that position.
Good luck in the future.
July 21, 2016 at 1:44 pm #110267
AnonymousGuestDear seauld:
It’s the day after (I didn’t get to your thread until now), so what took place???
You wrote: “On a whim, I applied for an assistant job down in a city on the coast..” Key word for me is “(on a) whim” and I am a suspect of what comes after that. You spent years operating with thoughtful, long term planning and there is some logic behind your long term planning. So I am suspicious of a whimsical move. I would say- hope you didn’t accept the job.
anita
July 21, 2016 at 2:06 pm #110269
greenerieParticipantThank you for your comments, I appreciate the thoughtful contributions of folks on this forum.
I accepted. The long term planning I’ve been following thus far aligns with other people’s expectations of what someone in this industry traditionally does. Looking at where that path was leading me, I found that path does not clearly lead to where I intended when I made the career switch in the first place. I’ve been held here by the fear that others will judge I have too little experience, or can’t do what I say I can, unless I fulfill some vague idea of “X # years” until I’m “ready” to reach for my goals. My main goal is nontraditional and bridges two disciplines, and will hopefully be somewhat revolutionary, so there is no path to it but the one I make.
I also want to feel happy to go to work again. I want to jump into the ambitious goals I have while I’m young enough to make them go somewhere. The whim that made me apply was “well, this would be cool, if they actually think my experience fits their expectations, and really, who says when I’m ready but me?”. The other part was, “How will I know I’ll like that job if I don’t go try it, and where better than there?”
Some inspirational and insightful posts on this site helped me. It’s a big, huge, crazy step with lots of risk and possibility. I’m going to take that step, trust in myself, and see where this goes.
July 22, 2016 at 8:10 am #110299AnonymousGuestDear seauld:
You are welcome and congratulations for accepting your new job and new life!
You wrote:
“The long term planning I’ve been following thus far aligns with other people’s expectations… not…where I intended…I’ve been held here by the fear that others will judge..”- this means you have yourself as the center of your planning and not other people. There is this term my therapist taught me: Locus Of Control (LOC): if it is other people controlling your choices/ your life, it is External LOC, or ELOC. If it is you who is controlling your choices/ your life, it is Internal LOC, ILOC. ELOC leads to misery and ILOC, well, this is the path to a good life.
“My main goal is nontraditional and bridges two disciplines, and will hopefully be somewhat revolutionary, so there is no path to it but the one I make.”- this is a winning attitude and goal, brings about my Wow! Abandoning the ELOC, the people pleasing path and making your own. Indeed it is revolutionary, the … path less travelled, your own!
I hope you post again and again. I would love to read further from you!
anita
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