Tiny Buddha

Tag: no

  • How the Word No Can Help You Achieve Your Goals

    How the Word No Can Help You Achieve Your Goals

    “If you lose today, win tomorrow.” ~Daisaku Ikeda

    From the moment we learn to walk and touch things, we hear the word no far more than we will ever hear the word yes.

    “No, don’t touch that.” “No, that’s not for you.” “No, you shouldn’t eat paint chips.” OK, maybe that last one was just me, but you get the picture.

    We are told no so much more than we are ever told yes during the course of growing up, so why is it as adults that hearing the word no can be so devastating? Shouldn’t we be used to it by now?

    As a rookie salesmen every time I heard the word no I got discouraged and thought I must be doing something wrong. I would constantly beat myself up.

    “What am I doing wrong?” “What can I do different?”

    These were great questions to ask myself; however, it’s the answers I supplied myself that turned out to be misleading.

    I figured that if people were saying no, it was because the process was failing me. How wrong I was.

    With sales, as in many aspects of life, there is a process—a start and a finish. Whether it’s setting and achieving goals, getting dressed, or cooking dinner, everything has a process, whether we consciously think about it or not.

    Like a naïve cocky rookie, I decided to abandon the process and started to do things my own way. Much to my surprise, I now heard no twice as many times.

    I just could not understand what was going on, so I got even harder on myself. (more…)

  • The Halfhearted Yes: Why We Don’t Say No and How to Start

    The Halfhearted Yes: Why We Don’t Say No and How to Start

    I'm Free

    “A ‘No’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a ‘Yes’ merely uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble.”  ~Gandhi

    I was having dinner with a friend of mine a couple weeks ago when I asked her about a group she was considering joining. I wanted to know how it was going and what she decided.

    “You know,” she said, “I realized after the first group that I’m not that passionate about it. So, I’m not going to do it. I’d rather make my time available for something that matters more to me.”

    Aside from this being a healthy choice, it was also a very conscious and deliberate choice. She chose in the direction of her passion.

    How many of us take what is handed to us, follow what is put in front of us, or say yes to things that don’t really align with who we are or what we want in our lives?

    I’m a huge fan of the word yes. (more…)

  • Say No

    Say No

    Smiling Flower

    “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~Dr. Seuss

    As children we’re taught to just say no, and we do it with abandon.

    Want to come inside and get ready for dinner? No! Want to shut off the TV and go grocery shopping? No! Want to wear the glittery holiday sweater grandma bought you last year? You know where this is going.

    Then we get older and learn about etiquette. We get that sometimes we need to do things that we don’t want to. We understand that other people’s feelings matter and we need to consider them before making decisions.

    What we don’t always learn is how to find a balance between doing for others and doing for ourselves.

    We say we value our time, but it’s difficult when we field a million requests through voicemail, email, IM, and text.

    We know we need to hold our ground if we want to be productive—or stay sane—but we don’t want to disappoint anyone, or even worse, leave them hanging when they need us. (more…)