Tiny Buddha

Tag: Difference

  • My Path to Purpose and an Unexpected Impact

    My Path to Purpose and an Unexpected Impact

    I wanted to be Mary Tyler Moore’s “Mary Richards” TV character from the 1970s. She had exactly what I wanted: independence and an exciting life! But growing up as the first girl in a traditional Italian family, I knew she was not the right role model.

    Nonetheless, I ignored the expected path (much to my parents’ dismay) and spent twelve years in corporate America becoming Mary. That is, until two questions rocked my world. I dramatically left my job, career, and Mary for a more purposeful path that was mine, and I never looked back.

    As a nine-year-old girl in front of the TV memorizing my idol’s every move, I could never have imagined this would be my story.

    As a successful television marketing executive in New York City, I had everything Mary had: a thrilling job in a big city, a pretty apartment, a fabulous wardrobe, a fun best friend, and co-workers like family. But one afternoon, while sitting alone in my pretty apartment in the big city of New York, my life changed forever when I heard an inner voice quietly yet clearly ask me:

    “If this is the next thirty years of your life, is this enough?”

    I was thirty-eight years old, and I knew all the voices in my head, but this one felt like it came from a deeper place and was located a little lower. In a millisecond, I knew the answer: No, something was missing. And I also knew what that something was—children.

    My mind went right to a recent TV news report where police and social workers were storming an apartment to remove children who were being hurt. I called the police and asked where they brought these children. They told me about the emergency shelters in our city for children who were abandoned and abused.

    Within minutes, I began calling these shelters, instinctively asking if I could visit in the evenings with storybooks to read to the children before bedtime. For several weeks, I showed up at the shelters, sitting on the floor in my business suit, with the children forming a crescent circle around me. I felt more personally grounded and connected to these children with every visit.

    The group of children was never the same, but in their silence, they all looked to me for comfort and safety. I never wanted to leave. One night after story time, I followed the staff to the bedroom.

    The children slowly climbed onto couches and futons. Some were crying as the compassionate caregivers tried to comfort them. But I didn’t see what I remembered as a child in my own bed. There were no hugs from moms or dads, no snacks, whispers, or prayers. There was no changing of their clothes from the tight or soiled clothing they arrived in.

    As I watched the children try to comfort themselves and each other, the words that tumbled out of my mouth were, “Can I bring the children pajamas next time?”

    The next week, after I read their stories, I gave each child a brand new pair of pajamas. One little girl, about six years old, refused to take a pair of pink PJs from me. Her hair hung in lopsided pigtails, she wore a stained top and a pair of too-short lavender pants, and extra-large sneakers flopped as she walked.

    She watched me for a long time, and when I finished with the others, I tried again to give her the cozy pink pair. She again shook her head. I knelt and whispered, “See how soft these pajamas are? Go ahead and feel them. You can keep them always.” And as she gingerly brushed her hand gently across a sleeve, she asked me wearily,

    “What are pajamas?”

    My mind raced. What?? I looked up at the loving aid next to her, who mouthed to me, “She doesn’t know what pajamas are.” And I found myself explaining to this precious girl what pajamas are. She took them slowly and went into the bedroom with the aid. As I collected myself and reached the door, I turned back and saw her waiting for me to see her in her new pajamas, a small smile forming on her lips.

    I took a leap of courage, and the Pajama Program was born. My purpose found me.

    Learning how to recognize and harness your heart voice is the key. Although it only takes a minute to hear it, it takes a while to trust and follow it.

    So, how do you trust that voice? I was stunned and had to collect myself before I even thought about what I had heard. I was alone, but I looked around cautiously to see if someone else was there. There was no one. But I already knew who asked that question—it was me, just in an unfamiliar voice.

    Learning how to recognize and harness your heart voice is the key. Although it only takes a minute to hear it, it takes a while to trust it and follow where it takes you. What happens next can catapult you into the unknown. But if you follow it, you will feel more fulfillment and joy than you ever have.

    Going from corporate executive to nonprofit founder was daunting, but after much fear and doubt, thousands of sleepless nights, and tears that could fill the Atlantic, I overcame challenges that I thought would ruin everything. Sometimes you just have to do it afraid.

    I met each turn with faith, determination, and moxie. I had found my purpose, and a chain of events set in motion by a little girl is creating a legacy we can only attribute to the magic of the human connection.

    “It’s not the power of one that changes things; it’s the power of ONE ANOTHER that moves mountains and moves people.”

    How do you go from “hearing a voice” to not only changing your life but also the lives of others? Each of us has a purpose. We know we have found it when our interests are turned outward and our natural desire becomes to lift others up by creating something that makes a lasting impact on all of us.

  • The You Matter Marathon: A Simple, FREE Way to Change Someone’s Life (No Running Required)

    The You Matter Marathon: A Simple, FREE Way to Change Someone’s Life (No Running Required)

    I care. I’m here. I’m sorry. You can.

    Two simple words can make a huge difference. They can soothe, heal, connect, and inspire.

    Perhaps the two most powerful words in the English language: You matter.

    Far too many people don’t believe this is true. Especially since the start of the pandemic, many have felt isolated, purposeless, and some even hopeless, wondering if they’ll ever feel connected and valuable again—if they ever even have.

    My new friend Cheryl Rice started this global kindness movement, the You Matter Marathon, for this very reason.

    It all began back in 2016 when a colleague handed her a business sized card with only those two powerful words on it—You matter.

    That gesture and those two words touched Cheryl deeply.

    Cheryl wanted to pay it forward, so she ordered her own You Matter cards and began sharing them with family and friends. From there, she began handing them out to people she appreciated in her community, like her dry cleaner and the man who sold her fruit at her local farmer’s market.

    Weeks later, she got confirmation that her simple mission had the capacity to completely transform someone’s day—and maybe even their life.

    She was standing behind a woman in the grocery store checkout line. The cashier asked the woman how she was doing. Instead of offering a painfully dishonest, knee-jerk “I’m fine,” she confessed that her husband had just lost his job, she was having issues with her son, and she didn’t know how she was going to get through the holidays. She then pulled out her food stamps.

    Cheryl’s heart ached for this woman, who she wished she could somehow help. She knew she couldn’t solve her problems or take away her pain, but she could give her one of the most powerful gifts anyone can receive from another human being—a moment of validation. And that’s exactly what she did when she approached the woman in the parking lot and handed her a You Matter card.

    The woman began to cry and said, “You have no idea how much this means to me.”

    Her response caught Cheryl off guard and cracked her heart open even further. She asked if she could give the woman a hug and then Cheryl went to her car and cried.

    So many people are starving for acknowledgment, walking through their days in a daze of pain, hoping someone will truly see them and care. Maybe you’re one of those people, or you were at one point in your life. I know I’ve been there before.

    We all want to believe that we matter and that our feelings matter, but we don’t always think to give this type of affirmation to the people we encounter. Maybe because we get wrapped up in our own problems or because we think it takes a lot of time or money to make a meaningful difference for someone else.

    But when we reach outside ourselves and make a heart-to-heart connection with someone who’s hurting, or who just yearns to be seen and valued as a human being, in that moment, we matter. We make a difference. And we inspire someone else to do the same, one life-affirming interaction at a time.

    That’s what the You Matter Marathon is about—creating positive connections within and between individuals and communities one card share at a time.

    To support their primary mission of sharing one million You Matter cards every November, they offer a free month’s supply of You Matter cards to anyone who signs up here.Since 2016, millions of cards have circulated through eighty-three countries, making a massive, stunningly positive impact. Join the movement and help heal the world, one day and one card at a time.

    To learn more, check out the one-minute You Matter Marathon highlight video and Cheryl’s ten-minute TEDx talk, You Matter—Changing the World with 2 Words.

  • 6 Things to Remember When You Think You Don’t Matter

    6 Things to Remember When You Think You Don’t Matter

    In a world with billions of people, in a culture that promotes being special and making a big mark, it’s easy to feel like you don’t matter.

    Maybe you’ve felt it all your life—like you have no purpose, no value, and nothing to contribute to anyone around you.

    Maybe you feel it off and on, when you’re struggling to find love or direction and think you need to somehow prove your worth.

    Or maybe you know that your life has value, but every now and then, when your head hits your pillow, you wonder if in the end, it will matter that you lived at all.

    I know what it’s like to question your worth. I grew up feeling inferior and unsure of myself, and felt lost and insignificant for many years after that. As an insecure introvert with high anxiety and low self-esteem, I simultaneously wanted to belong and hoped to find a way to stand out. So I could feel important. Valuable. Worth knowing, worth loving, worth remembering when I’m gone.

    I’m also naturally a deep thinker, which means I’ve often questioned my place in the world and the meaning of life itself.

    If you can relate to any of what I’ve wrote, I hope you’ll find some comfort in knowing…

    1. You are not alone.

    We all struggle with the question of why we’re here, if we have a purpose, and if our lives will really matter in the grand scheme of things. Google “existential crisis” and you’ll find over 4.5 million results. Search for “I don’t matter” and that number shoots up to more than 100 mil.

    On days when you feel insignificant it might seem irrelevant that others do too. And it is, if you only know, intellectually, that you’re not alone instead of truly feeling it. I know from personal experience the soul-crushing sense of separation you feel when you stuff your insecurities down and pretend you’re fine when you’re not.

    So open up. Tell someone what you’re feeling. Write in a blog post. And wait to hear “me too.” When you feel the comfort of belonging, remember that you provided that to someone else. And, that, my friend, is you mattering.

    2. Just because you think you don’t matter, that doesn’t mean it’s true.

    Thoughts aren’t facts. They’re fleeting, constantly changing, and influenced by our mood, beliefs, and early programming.

    On days when I’m at my lowest, it’s often because I’m responding to an accumulation of physical and emotional challenges, sometimes without conscious awareness.

    I’m exhausted from insufficient sleep, weakened from dehydration or poor food choices, and/or emotionally triggered by events that hit me right in my core childhood wounds. For example, maybe someone fails to respond to my email—for over a week—and this reinforces the belief I formed when mistreated as a kid: that there’s something wrong with me, and I’m not good enough and unlovable.

    Add all those things up, and I’m primed to glom on to every negative thought that floats through my brain as if it were true. But they’re not. They’re judgments, assumptions, conclusions, and interpretations, all held in place by the glue of my current mood and limited perception.

    The same is true for you. You might think you don’t matter today, and perhaps you did yesterday, and the many days before that too. But that thought doesn’t accurately reflect your reality; it merely represents your perspective in those moments. A perspective shaped by many things, some deep below the surface.

    3. When other people treat you like you don’t matter, it’s about them, not you.

    Speaking of core childhood wounds, many times when we think we don’t matter it’s partly because other people have treated us like we don’t—and possibly from the day we were born.

    If you were abused, neglected, abandoned, or oppressed, as a kid or in an adult relationship, it’s easy to conclude you somehow deserved it. But you didn’t, and you don’t. No one does.

    They didn’t treat you poorly because you are you. They did it because they are them. They didn’t treat you like you didn’t matter because you have no value. They did it because they were too caught up in their own pain and patterns to recognize and honor your intrinsic worth.

    Unfortunately, the beliefs formed through abuse are insidious because they impact not only our self-worth but our sense of identity. And it can be difficult to untangle the many intertwined threads of who we believe we are, and why. But even if you’ve just started on the long road to healing, sometimes it’s enough just to recognize you formed a negative belief based on how you were treated—and you can, in time, let it go.

    4. You don’t have to do big things to matter.

    It’s easy to feel like your life doesn’t matter if you aren’t doing something big—if you’re not saving the world, or running an empire, or traveling the globe with the hashtagged pics to prove it.

    But meaning doesn’t have to come only from accomplishments—and sometimes the most traditionally successful people are actually the most unfulfilled. If you’re too busy to enjoy the money you’ve earned, does it really have any value? If you have more followers than true friends, can you ever really feel loved?

    Big things feed the ego, there’s no doubt about it, and yes, they make an impact. But when you reflect on the people who’ve mattered most to you personally, is it a CEO you visualize? Or a celebrity? Or a medalist? I’m guessing it might be a teacher, or a grandparent, or even someone who entered your life only briefly yet had a profound influence on the path you took simply because they listened and truly cared.

    Not everyone can be someone everyone knows, but everyone can be someone who someone else loves.

    5. You’ve made a difference to far more people than you likely realize.

    Since we’re in the thick of the holiday season, it seems appropriate to cite one of my favorite movies, the classic It’s a Wonderful Life. Cliché, I know, but fitting, nonetheless.

    When George Bailey was standing on a bridge in a whirlwind of snow, with a bottle of booze and a brain full of regrets, he had no idea just how many people he’d impacted over the years through tiny acts of love and kindness.

    He saw his life as a montage of failures and missed opportunities, when, to others, he was the light that led them home on a dark, scary night. And he may never have known it if life hadn’t provided a compelling reason for people to rally around with support.

    Let’s face it, life is often hard for most of us. We’re all healing our own wounds, dealing with our own day-to-day struggles, caught up in a web of our own dramas. And we all have a negativity bias, which means most of us spend more time scanning our environment for potential threats than recognizing and appreciating our blessings.

    You are someone’s blessing, and probably have been many times over. You’ve said the right thing at just the right time, without even realizing they needed to hear it. You’ve offered a smile when someone else felt lonely, without realizing you eased their pain. You’ve been someone’s friend, their resource, their champion, their safe space, their inspiration, and their hope. To you, it was just a text, but it helped them hold it together. To you, it was just a hug, but it kept them from falling apart.

    As someone once said (but I’m not sure who), “Never think you don’t have an impact. Your fingerprints can’t be wiped away from the little marks of kindness that you’ve left behind.”

    6. You matter to people you haven’t met yet (or who weren’t even born yet).

    It’s easy to feel like you don’t matter if you don’t have people in your life who reflect your worth—friends, family, a significant other; anyone who values you and shows, through their words and actions, that they want and need you in their life.

    But just because you don’t feel important to anyone right now, that doesn’t mean you never will. There are people you’ve yet to meet whose life highlight reel will get better in the middle or at the end because that’s when you came in. There are friends you’ve yet to make who will finally feel like they have family because you’ve filled a hole no one else could fill. And maybe one day a pair of tiny arms will squeeze you tight and remind you that you matter more to them than anyone else ever could.

    The story of your life is only partially written, and there are leading roles yet to be cast. If your current scene feels lonely or empty, remember that every great story brings a protagonist to the lowest low before catapulting them to the highest heights.

    —

    If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years of running this site, it’s that beliefs precede actions, which then confirm beliefs. If you believe you don’t matter, you likely won’t do anything that could matter, and then you’re all the more likely to feel unimportant and alone.

    But if you hold onto any of what I wrote above, you’ll be far more likely to do something with your life—or even just with your day—that could make a difference for the people around you.

    Maybe you’ll offer someone an ear or a hand or a piece of your heart or create something that helps or heals.

    And in that moment when you see your impact, you’ll realize what it truly means to matter: to know your value and create a little more love and light in the world by giving it away as often as you can.

  • Why My Chronic Illness Can’t Stop Me from Making a Difference in the World

    Why My Chronic Illness Can’t Stop Me from Making a Difference in the World

    “We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.” ~Mary Dunbar

    What is one eye-opening experience should everyone have?

    I stumbled upon this question a few weeks ago and it got me into deep introspection.

    The first thing that came to my mind made me feel both happy and sad. The smile faded as soon as it crossed my face.

    Let me explain…

    My Eye-Opening Experience

    One eye-opening experience I had and believe everyone should have is spending time with poor kids.

    I love children.

    I’m one of those people who gets wowed when kids can count one to three or recite the alphabet by heart. I was a teacher, and the kids were my favorite students. I’ve met and played with a lot of kids, but my experience with poor kids was extra special.

    In 2012, my friend invited me to visit some kids in a community that I had never heard of. I wasn’t from an affluent family, but I had never seen real poverty up close.

    Tiny and crowded homes made with light materials, no electricity and/or running water for many families, and malnourished, sick, and dirty kids.

    We visited them at least once a week to teach family values, spirituality, and hygiene. We fed them, played with them, and most importantly, we loved them. These were fifty to a hundred kids ages two to sixteen.

    Our leader tasked me to interview ten kids in a span of ten months. The organization that sponsored our feeding program for two years required us to submit these reports monthly.

    I had the privilege to choose which kid to interview per month. I chose kids with different personalities. The shy ones. The playful ones. And the wallflowers.

    I will treasure those interviews forever. The one-on-one talks with these children were life-changing for me. They were the intimate encounters I looked forward to every month.

    I got the rare chance to know their stories in a deep way.

    It was heartbreaking to hear that some kids missed schools because they didn’t have food to eat. Some kids were made fun of because of how they looked. Others had to scavenge and collect recyclables in the streets to sell and help their families earn some money.

    Despite the cold meals and floors, lack of basic needs, and other daily struggles, they had a sparkle in their eyes and sweetness in their smiles. Their resilience was so unbelievable that I had no doubt that one day, they will change the world.

    Words are not enough to explain my thoughts and feelings through this experience. But this experience has given me a new set of lenses that allowed me to see the world in a different way.

    I learned to be more generous, self-giving, loving, and compassionate. The words “gratitude” and “appreciation” became deeper and more meaningful. I learned to view this life beyond me.

    This was my weekly routine for three years until…

    I Had A Relapse

    I stopped going and seeing these kids. Now, this is why the thought of this eye-opening experience gave me mixed emotions. You see, I’ve been fighting chronic illnesses for about ten years, but in 2016, my health took its turn for the worse.

    My dizzy spells became more intense and frequent. I couldn’t stand the outdoors because it was either too hot or too cold for me. I was like a battery that wouldn’t charge up.

    I’ve accepted that my doctors couldn’t give me straight answers (yet) on what has been going on with me. But it was frustrating when my world came to a halt. Again.

    While my recovery has been consistent (slow and steady), I still don’t know if I can go back and serve these kids again. I don’t know if my body could still handle it.

    In a way, I felt my chronic illness robbed my purpose and self-worth once again. I just wanted to serve. What’s wrong with that?

    But one day, I thought that service to humanity takes different forms, shapes, and sizes. Nothing is too big or too small. As long as you give with all your heart.

    I realized I could get around my chronic illness and still help make a difference one life at a time.

    Nothing fancy. Nothing grand. Just me and my warm and sometimes wimpy heart.

    Modern Calligraphy

    Initially, I did this for myself. It was out of boredom, stress, and frustration.

    When I was mostly homebound, I looked for a new hobby that would help me get out of my head and feel the excitement of trying something new again.

    Affirmations, verses, quotes, and words of encouragement that spoke to me took me on a whole new level when I see them beautifully written in bouncy and flowy letters. Every stroke helped me focus, meditate, and relax. Even when the strokes were shaky, I was amused by the work of my hands.

    When I became a little more confident, I decided to share my creations with the world. I set up a public IG account with the goal to edify women with chronic illness through modern calligraphy.

    I also make notes for family and friends extra special with the beautiful and free strokes of modern calligraphy.

    World Vision

    I may not be able to serve and spend time with dozens of kids all at the same time, and that’s okay. Changing one kid’s life would be more than enough.

    Last year, I decided to sponsor one child through World Vision. It was another opportunity for me to have a personal connection with a child from a poor community.

    It’s a humbling experience to help the child to pay for school supplies, uniform, and other expenses. Through this program, her community benefits, too.

    My eyes and heart well up when I get their regular updates with photos, community reports, child’s progress, and more.

    Writing

    I’m introverted. I’ve kept a lot of my deepest thoughts to myself. Last year, I decided to be a little bolder and vulnerable by sharing my journey through writing.

    I’ve realized that every story matters. Every story is special. Every story heals.

    Most importantly, we can learn from each other.

    What’s Next

    You don’t need to do something huge to make a positive difference in the world. Regardless of your time, resources, and individual limitations, you can make an impact.

    I encourage you to create a small service project before the year ends. Before that voice of doubt whispers that it’s impossible or it won’t make a dent in the world, let’s sit down and plan for this project.

    Below, you will see a list of questions that serve as your starting point.

    Skills/Talents/Passion: What can I offer?

    1. What did I love to do as a child?
    2. What types of things do family or friends usually seek my help for?
    3. What are my interests?
    4. When do I feel most joyful?
    5. What do I do most naturally?
    6. What is the idea or vision that keeps me up at night?
    7. What am I doing when I feel the most authentic?

    Time: When will I do it?

    1. How much time can I set aside for this project?
    2. How often do I want to do this?
    3. How long can I do it?
    4. When can I start?

    Recipient: Who will I serve?

    1. Where do I feel the happiest?
    2. Who do I care about?
    3. Who are the people going through what I’ve been through? Or going through similar challenges?
    4. Who needs my skills and talents?

    You may not know the answers to all of these questions right now, and that’s okay. Take all the time you need and go through them again whenever you can.

    And remember…

    Small things add up. Small things make bigger things. Small things create ripples.

    Start where you are with what you have.

  • 7 Simple Ways to Give Back to the World When You Have Little Time or Money

    7 Simple Ways to Give Back to the World When You Have Little Time or Money

    “I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.” ~Maya Angelou

    Being charitable is often seen as a zero sum game, giving away our time or money for the benefit of others. As uplifting as it may be to give to a cause you care about, most of us feel we lack the authority to truly make things happen.

    I discovered the transformative power of helping others when I was eight years old. My friends and I had imaginations like other children, but in the summer of 1989 our ideas became action—we organized an event to raise money for a local leukemia charity.

    Every day, on a patch of grass by the river, in the shadow of a 10th century abbey, my friends and I would play soccer. As it was the summer holiday and we had never stayed up all night, we conceived of a marvelous plan to organize a sponsored, all-night soccer match.

    What we lacked in official charity affiliation, we made up for in enthusiasm. We walked for miles, knocking on every single door to obtain sponsors for our unconventional soccer match. We asked anyone that sponsored us how many goals we’d score during the night. The person who came closest would win a signed ball from the local professional soccer club.

    Within two days we managed to collect over 100 pounds in sponsor funds. More importantly, we had planted a seed in ourselves, a raison d’etre.

    People arrived to show their support, cheering with each goal that we scored well into the balmy summer evening. As the sun set, only we kids were left, with my dad as the sole spectator. Our motivation never waned as we played into the early hours of Sunday morning.

    The pride and sense of achievement we gained from helping that leukemia charity led me to a profound realization: Positively impacting others is far more meaningful than the satisfaction of a personal goal that wears off after a day.

    Time after time I hear people say that either a lack of time or money prevents them from volunteering or donating to a cause. It isn’t that they don’t care; it’s just that they don’t feel empowered to actually do anything. After hearing this collective frustration from so many people who wished they could do more, I decided to compile this list.

    What if there were various ways you could help others without sacrificing your already-tight budget or precious free time? Below are six small changes you can make in your daily life that have a stunning social impact over time.

    1. Amazon Smile

    As the light of the laptop glows upon my face and the dopamine rush of retail therapy hits, my late night Amazon shopping spree is an unexpected source of social good. With their low prices and free two-day Prime shipping, Amazon is my go-to source when shopping online.

    Over 250 million people use Amazon, but only a fraction use Amazon Smile, a simple and automatic way to support your favorite charity. When you shop through smile.amazon.com, you’ll find the same selection and low prices with an added bonus: Amazon will donate 0.5% of the price of your purchases to your favorite charity. The donation is automatic after checkout.

    Over the past twelve months I have spent an embarrassing $2,800 at Amazon, and often, when buying impulsively, I would forget to visit smile.amazon.com. But since installing a Google Chrome extension, I am automatically redirected to smile.amazon.com when I click on any Amazon link or navigate to amazon.com in my browser.

    Annual Impact: $2,800 x 0.05 = $14

    2. Charity Miles

    Most of us walk, some of us run, while others prefer to cycle. What if we could not only improve our health from daily exercise, but also do social good as we sweat? Over the past few years I have been on a quest to run a marathon on every continent to help raise awareness and funds for refugees, and the Charity Miles app has helped to multiply my fundraising efforts.

    Charity Miles sends money to a charity of your choosing for each mile that you walk, hike, run, or cycle. Simply download the app for your Android or iOS device, select a charity, and then perform your exercise as you normally would.

    The charity that you select earns money for every mile completed. Walkers, hikers, and runners earn $.25 per mile; bikers earn $.10 per mile. The app even has an indoor mode if you prefer to use the treadmill.

    Total Effect = 1,200 miles of running = $300
    600 miles of walking = $155
    600 miles of cycling = $60

    Annual Impact: $515

    3. GoodSearch.com

    The most common online activity besides browsing social media is searching. We use search engines to help us at work, with our personal lives, when shopping, and in just about every scenario imaginable. Search engines are how we find information.

    GoodSearch is touted as a philanthropic search engine. Instead of instinctively heading to Google, start using GoodSearch instead and contribute to the millions of dollars already raised for charity. To remember to do this, just replace Google as your browser’s default homepage. In addition, shopping through GoodShop allows you to donate to charity just like Amazon Smile does.

    Annual Impact= 5 searches a day x 365 = $18.25

    4. FreeRice.com

    Brain-training games have become a big business over the past few years with companies such as Lumosity and Elevate dominating the niche. But rather than paying money to exercise your brain, flex your neurons and help a charity at the same time with FreeRice.com.

    For each question you answer correctly, Freerice.com donates ten grains of rice to the World Food Programme. The game is surprisingly therapeutic. It helps me to decompress after a long day, and it allows me to multitask: learning new information while effortlessly donating to charity. After just five minutes of game-time I earned 750 grains of rice for the World Food Programme.

    Annual Impact: 750 x 365 = 273,750 grains of rice or 9.4lbs

    5. The Hunger Site

    The Hunger Site allows users to donate food by simply clicking a button! No actual donation is required. Simply click the yellow button on the main page and repeat daily. After clicking you can see the results for that day – including how many people clicked and how much food was donated in kilograms, tons, and pounds.

    Annual Impact: 0.14 lb x 365 =51lbs of Food

    6. Satorio.org

    The growing body of evidence supporting meditation has already been widely publicized by mainstream media outlets. Not only can meditation reduce stress, anxiety, and blood pressure, but it can also boost creativity, focus, and the immune system.

    Using Satorio.org, you can obtain these benefits while simultaneously helping to end world hunger—no effort or money is required.

    When you start hitting the gym, you observe small improvements and gradual changes along the way. The same is true with meditation. It is a workout for your mind that can have ripple effects on your life and the people around you. The idea behind Satorio is to show, in a more tangible way, the beneficial impact that your meditation can have on others.

    By meditating for twenty minutes a day, you give 73,000 grains of rice to Oxfam annually:

    Annual Impact: 20 x 10 x 365 = 73,000 grains of rice or 2.5lbs

    7. Forest

    As you are reading TinyBuddha, you no doubt appreciate the art of being mindful with your time. Forest, an app I started using recently, not only helps me be more mindful, but also increases my productivity massively.

    Forest encourages you to resist the temptation of leaving the app to check Facebook, text, or to play a game, by making your virtual tree wither away when you do. The Tamagotchi sense of achievement I get from nurturing my forest, motivates me to stay away from the distracting element of my phone when I am supposed to be working.

    I would gladly pay the $1.99 for the app’s productivity boost alone; however, the added social benefit are the real trees that are planted after achieving certain milestones.

    Total Effect:

    2 x 25 minutes sessions per day = 2 trees planted a year

    —

    Over the course of a year, using these websites can provide $547 and over sixty pounds of food. Imagine how many millions of people would be fed and helped if even 1% of the world did this.

    So if you’ve been stuck in a defeatist mindset, assuming there is nothing you can do, think again. These incredibly simple efforts can fuel positive change and support programs that save lives around the world.

  • Are You Showing Up in the World as Your Best Self?

    Are You Showing Up in the World as Your Best Self?

    Happy handsome man smiling on the beach

    “Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.” ~Robert Kennedy

    Many years ago, I had the opportunity to take a yoga class at San Quentin State Prison in Northern California.

    I had visited the prison before, attending other classes, with inmates, on anger management and a class based on Bryon Katie’s The Work, but this was my first yoga class.

    It was an evening class, which made the prison seem that much more foreboding, and the class was full of lifers. The inmates in that room had committed very serious crimes. Most would never again see outside the prison’s walls.

    A man sat down on the mat next to mine and immediately struck up a conversation.

    He shared with me that the class had changed him in ways he hadn’t anticipated, that the yoga and mindfulness practice was helping him see the oneness in the world, and the invisible connections between all of us.

    He had also begun to realize the damage he had caused by taking a life, not just to himself and the victim, but to his family, his community, and that of the victim’s. The circle of people affected by the violent act and its outcome was ever-widening. He had been in prison for years but had never really considered all of that before starting his yoga practice.

    He said that what he had done was like throwing a pebble in a pond that causes ripples, only, he said, his was like tossing a brick in, and the ripples became destructive, monster-size waves.

    That man will never again see the outside of the prison walls, yet he is taking significant steps to show up a better person and make a difference.

    He is starting with himself.

    When you take steps toward becoming your best self, no matter what you’ve done or how you’ve felt in the past, it is essential to walk your talk, while recognizing that even a tiptoe makes ripples.

    How, you may ask, can you become your most authentic version of yourself? How can you live your values?

    Start to imagine tiny ways that you can make a difference in your community, and then translate those thoughts into actions.

    For example, if you love your neighborhood, support local businesses. If you love the Earth, recycle and compost. When you travel, look into staying at hotels and participating in activities that are both eco and socially aligned. Those are easy choices that help you feel (and be!) aligned with your values.

    Of course there will be days where you trip, and sometimes fall and scrape your knee (or just your ego), but if you do your best, your best keeps getting better!

    Your next step after a fall: Brush yourself off and examine what happened and why, then continue on the path with this new knowledge. Each time, it gets a little easier.

    Every choice we make makes a difference.

    In contrast to the lifer whose body was literally imprisoned, I knew another person whose mind it seemed was figuratively trapped. He once told me that nothing he did had any effect on anyone or anything else in the world. My heart sank—for him, and for all of us.

    The truth is, every tiny thing we do leads somewhere. Social change of any kind starts with the individual, with our thoughts, words, and actions.

    What we do and how we choose to be present in the world impacts not only our own lives, but the entire global community. The interconnections of every living being are infinite and continuously unfolding.

    From inside of the tall, unyielding prison walls, lined with razor wire and lookout posts with armed guards, the lifer I met in that yoga class was choosing to show up, contribute, and make a difference.

    He recognized that while he was only one person and had severe limitations imposed on him, he could still create positive ripples. His actions translated into a better, more mindful life for himself and those with whom he came into contact.

    We Generate Positive Ripples by Living Authentically

    This event took place nearly a decade now, but to this day, his story has stayed with me, continuing to generate positive ripples in my own life. On the person I choose to be. On the way I choose to show up in the world. On the choices I make, the words I speak and the actions I take.

    Over the years, I have learned that it takes so much more oomph to get through the day when I’m not living authentically compared to when I am.

    Inauthentic living is draining and depleting. By showing up as the most genuine version of myself, I have so much more energy, time, and space to do more in the world, creating positive ripples near and far.

    Whenever and wherever we touch the water—we toss a feather, or a pebble or a boulder, negative or positive—the ripples and waves travel as far as the eye can see (and then keep going).

    What’s most important to you? How do you reflect that through your daily thoughts, words, and actions? How do you show up in the world…what ripples are you creating?

    How do you start living authentically and create more positive ripples?

    First, define your core values. How do they show up in your daily life? How are you living them and/or not living them?

    Next, be present where you are. Each step you take on the path will bring your values more into light.

    Lastly, continue on the path, even when you fall.

    It may not happen overnight, but eventually, your values will equal your words and your actions. You will also recognize your missteps much faster as you live more authentically. You’ll then be able to correct them and continue on the path, creating more positive ripples.

  • To Make a Difference in Someone’s Life

    To Make a Difference in Someone’s Life

    To make a difference in someone's life

  • To Make a Difference in Someone’s Life

    To Make a Difference in Someone’s Life

    To make a difference in someones life

    Source: Positive Energy+

  • You Don’t Need to Do Big Things to Change the World

    You Don’t Need to Do Big Things to Change the World

    Holding the earth

    “Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.” ~Mother Teresa

    Life is complicated. The world’s problems are extremely complex. But what if you could help solve the world’s problems? What if you were a world changer?

    Seems rather daunting, doesn’t it? Me? Change the world?! I used to feel like an ostrich, burying my head in the sand and trying to ignore all the hurt and evil in the world, because I felt helpless, like there wasn’t anything I could do.

    I didn’t always feel that way though. There was a time when I felt I could make a difference…

    Four months before my grandmother died, I sat by her bedside, holding her hand, and we had what turned out to be the last real conversation we had together on this earth. She looked at me and said, “I always wished I had done something great in this world.”

    I told her that she had done something great! She had raised five wonderful children. She had helped and influenced so many for good during her life.

    As I said those words to her, I truly believed them. I knew that by simply living a good, honest life and being kind to those around her, she had had a huge impact on the world. She had had a huge impact on me.

    Yet somehow, fourteen years later, I realized I had fallen into that same trap.

    I found myself thinking I wasn’t doing anything significant or worthwhile in this world because I wasn’t working in refugee camps or stopping genocides. I felt that I wasn’t “changing the world” because I hadn’t done something “major” to help the world.

    Do you feel the same way? Are you discounting the work you are doing within your home and family, within your community of friends, within your neighborhood? Are you forgetting the impact that your everyday acts of service and love can make?

    I used to think “changing the world” consisted only of really big sweeping movements that made lasting change the world over.

    I would think of actions worthy of being written in the history books. I would think of Mother Teresa creating the Missionaries of Charity and caring for thousands upon thousands of the destitute in Calcutta. I would think of rebuilding a city after a natural disaster.

    Although these examples do indeed change the world, when you really get down to it, to “change the world” means to make a change to better one person’s world. By helping one person feel special, loved, and important, you are changing the world for one individual at a time.

    It reminds me of a time, years ago, that I was sitting in my car at a gas station. I cannot tell you what my day was like before this moment or after, but as I sat there, a man walked by with a big smile on his face. He didn’t look at me or even see me, but he changed my life.

    A true, genuine smile is contagious, it spreads to all who observe it, and that’s what happened that day. His smile spread to me and I was uplifted. Over a decade later, I still think about that incident and try to intentionally smile as I go about my day.

    Mother Teresa cared for thousands over the years, but she cared for and loved one individual at a time. She said, “There are no great deeds. Only small deeds done with great love.”

    We may not stop genocides or serve those in the refugee camps today, but we can do something for someone today. Not only does that mean you are not insignificant, but it means that you can, in fact, change someone’s world every single day.

    We just need to change our mind about what it means to change the world!

    I have started calling myself a “world changer.” It felt awkward at first, but slowly, I have started to believe it again and you can too.

    Before this powerful realization, I had started to take the Ostrich Strategy. No, I didn’t stick my head in the sand. (Ostriches don’t really stick their head in the sand; they’d suffocate just like you and I would if we tried that!)

    When an ostrich is frightened, it will either run away or it will lie down low and stretch their necks out along the ground in front of them, as flat as they can, in the hopes that they will blend in.

    Running away or lying low in an attempt to go unnoticed and then hoping the world gets better is not an effective strategy for change. Actively changing your own world in order to change the rest of the world is.

    Changing your world will change the world.

    As I told my grandmother that day, so I tell myself and you, you are doing great things each day. You make the world a better place each time you serve or love someone else. Then those people you serve will share that love with others, starting a ripple of love.

    As more and more ripples form, aided by the winds of time, they will create a virtual storm of love that will crash along the shores of humanity, washing away the evil and the rough edges, leaving a new shoreline, a new world.

    Changing the world starts at home within ourselves and our families, expanding out with the ripple effect, creating a storm and changing the world for one person at a time with each kind word and act of love given to a stranger or friend.

    One act or grand gesture alone won’t change the whole world, but it can change the world for someone, who will change it for someone else, who will change is for someone else, and on and on.

    Just like that man walking through the gas station started a ripple by changing my day over a decade ago, changing the world will involve many people doing many small acts of love to accomplish great things and lasting change. Changing the world starts at home. It starts with you.

    If you believe you are insignificant and that your efforts are not enough, you will be unhappy and the world will suffer by missing out on all the good that you have to offer. But, if you realize you have great power and a responsibility to touch another person’s life each day, resulting in world-changing ripples of love, you will be starting a storm that changes the world.

    So stop being an ostrich. Choose to act. Take the world by storm instead!

    Holding earth image via Shutterstock

  • What You Do Makes a Difference

    What You Do Makes a Difference

    What you do makes a difference

  • Being Different Is a Good Thing

    Being Different Is a Good Thing

    Being Different

    Source: NotSalmon.com

  • Your Kindness Could Help Someone Find Hope in the Darkness

    Your Kindness Could Help Someone Find Hope in the Darkness

    “Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.” ~Scott Adams

    I was ten years old and growing up in a home that I can only describe as hellish. Among other things, our father forced us to stand against the wall for long periods of time until we shook from exhaustion. On one such day, he sent me to McDonald’s to buy him a cup of coffee.

    I was happy to get out of the house and escape my punishment momentarily. As I headed to McDonald’s, I wondered what it would be like to never have to go back home. I hoped that I would have a better life someday, but I could not see how.

    When I arrived at my destination and opened my mouth to order the coffee, I burst into tears. I just could not hold them back any longer and they came pouring out right there at the counter in McDonald’s.

    As I stood there, a sobbing, broken little ten-year-old girl, a lady came out of nowhere. She said, “Sweetheart, would you like something for yourself? I will buy you anything you want. Just tell me what it is and I will get if for you.”

    I was so touched by her kindness that I cried even harder. There was nothing on that menu I wanted. I wanted a better life. I wanted never to have to go home again.

    Eventually I stopped crying and went home with the coffee, but I never forgot that lady or her kindness to me. I’ve often wished that I could find her and thank her for what she did that day.

    We interact with so many people every day, in traffic, at the office, and online. If you walk down the sidewalk in a major city you will walk past hundreds of people. The next time you do this, look at them. Really look at them.

    Every single one of these people has had his or her heart broken at one time or another. Guaranteed. You never know what other people are dealing with.

    The person who cut you off in traffic may be struggling with a difficult child or spouse. He or she may have just gotten fired. Of course, it’s possible that they’re simply rude, but you never know. We can’t always be at our best, but we can try.

    It is not always possible to know why people act the way they do, but I can guarantee that you will feel better if you give people the benefit of the doubt more often than not.

    When in doubt, be kind. It doesn’t cost anything to be kind.

    Can you express concern for someone today? Will you take a minute to hold the door for someone or let them in front of you in traffic?

    Why not pick up the phone and call a friend who could use a kind word? You could send a quick email or text to someone you’ve been thinking of. If you want to go all-out, send a hand-written note or card to someone.

    When you encounter a person who is less than charming, consider taking a deep breath and trying to understand where he or she is coming from. Do they have a point? Can you let it go?

    Instead of rushing through your day, try slowing down and seeing how you can be of assistance. Be open to being of service, even in small ways. Instead of worrying because you’re too busy at work to volunteer on a regular basis, you could just volunteer for an hour or two.

    You can make an enormous impact on someone’s life, even with one small kindness. I still struggle to find the words to describe how much that simple act of compassion meant to me all those years ago.

    I went back home and life was still hard. Nothing changed for a very long time, but I had a tiny seed of hope in my heart that began to grow.

    I went to bed that night knowing that there is kindness in this world. Good things were possible and all was not lost. Somehow, it would be okay because there are good people in the world.

    Even today when I’m struggling with something and all seems lost, I remember that day. I remember that there’s always hope. I send a silent thank you to my would-be benefactor.

    You don’t have to be Mother Teresa or Abraham Lincoln to make an impact in someone’s life. You can simply take a minute out of your day to encourage someone. You never know how much of a difference you can make with one small act of kindness.

    If you lived in the south suburbs of Chicago in the late seventies and offered to buy something for a crying girl at McDonald’s, I want to send you a very belated thank you. This post is dedicated to you.

  • 99-Year-Old Woman Makes a Dress Per Day for a Child in Need

    99-Year-Old Woman Makes a Dress Per Day for a Child in Need

    She’s almost 100 years old, but that hasn’t stopped Lillian Weber from making a massive difference in the world.

    Every day she starts and finishes a unique dress for Little Dresses for Africa, a non-profit that distributes dresses to impoverished young girls in Africa and beyond. She’s made more than 840 so far, and hopes to keep going to reach her goal making 1,000.

    What an amazing woman, and what an inspiring goal!

  • Life Lessons on What Really Matters from a Dying Man

    Life Lessons on What Really Matters from a Dying Man

    All We Need Is Love

    “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” ~Mahatma Gandhi

    You know how you can remember exactly when you found out that Michael Jackson died? I think it’s called flashbulb memory. It’s when something traumatic happens and because of that, you remember everything else that was occurring at the time. I was on a bus in Santorini after watching an amazing sunset in Oia.

    The day I found out my boyfriend was dying was just like that, but worse. I remember everything.

    Let me digress.

    We spent the week leading up to the surgery that was his last chance at life at Vancouver General Hospital, where we passed the days planning our casual beach wedding in Tulum.

    We pictured it down to the last very last detail. I would walk down the aisle (barefoot of course) to Bob Marley’s “Turn Your Lights Down Low” and a mariachi band would serenade us at dinner. It gave him hope and something positive to think about when the pangs of hunger threatened his usually calm demeanor.

    They made him fast for days as we waited for a surgery room to finally open.

    According to the doctors, the likelihood of him surviving the surgery was only 50%. We savored each moment as best we could, enjoying each other’s company and focusing on love.

    When the nurse came to tell us it was time, I was taking a very rare moment in the hospital cafeteria, as I didn’t want to eat in front of him. I rushed up the elevator and made just in time to accompany him downstairs.

    It was one of the only times I cried in front of him. I didn’t know if I should say goodbye, just in case.

    I looked into his brave eyes. I told him I loved him. I held his hand until I was no longer allowed. The doctor told me not to cry.

    I made my way to the family room where my best friend and our families waited. I felt loved. And scared to death. I remember thinking that this is what it means when they say “blood curdling fear.” I got it and I thought it was fascinating.

    The surgery was supposed to take about five hours, so my best friend took me to my dad’s hotel so I could take shower and a break. I lasted about fifteen minutes before I needed to go back.

    That’s the way it was in those days. Every cell in my entire being simply needed to be there. When I returned, I noticed a bridal magazine in waiting room. I flipped through and found my most beautiful dream dress. I hoped it was a good omen.

    Two hours later, the doctor came in. He looked defeated. I could barely stand up.

    He sat down and with a tremendous amount of compassion (and tears in his eyes), he told me that they had found Benito’s liver completely covered in tumors and therefore a resection or transplant was not possible.

    I remember the moment when courage and fear collided. I asked, “Is he gonna die?”

    And, I remember the doctor’s answer, “We’ve done a bit to make him more comfortable, but there is nothing else we can do.”

    I curled up into a tiny ball on the hospital chair with my head between my legs and sobbed.

    The doctor assigned me the task of telling Benito. He said it would be better coming from me.

    I remember sitting in the corridor holding his mom’s hand. Waiting. Doctors rushed passed with patients on stretchers. I thought of my mom. At the time, she was MIA in Costa Rica. She didn’t even know he was sick. I didn’t even know she was alive. I wanted her to hold me.

    When I saw him, lying there like a helpless child covered in tubes, my breath escaped me for a moment. But I told myself to stay calm. This next part was about him. It was all about him.

    He was groggy from the anesthesia, but he looked at me. With jolt of last minute courage, I put my hand on his boney shoulder and I told him everything. He was too high to really get it.

    He went in and out of consciousness. Each time he woke up, he asked in almost a joking way, “Am I dying? Am I really dying?” I retold the story, barely holding it together. He told jokes. One time, much to the nurse’s amusement, he even belted out an AC/DC tune while attempting a feeble air guitar. He was awesome.

    But two things he said that day, while moving in and out of drug-induced sleep, have shaped my life forever. The first was, “If I only I had ten more years, just think of all the good I could do.” And the second was, “I feel sorry for you.”

    I was shocked, so I asked him why. He said, “Because your boyfriend is dying. We were supposed to get married and adopt babies from Peru” followed by a joke of course, just to cheer me up.

    He said, “Now don’t go dating any of my friends while I’m gone. You’re hot and I know them. They’re gonna try.” Like I said, awesome.

    I think of these two things often in my life—that compassion for others and that strong drive to make a difference in the world.

    Turns out, when a thirty-one-year old party-boy finds out he’s dying, compassion for others and making a difference is the driving force. And, making the entire recovery room laugh of course.

    This is a lesson I’ll never forget. I got my ten more years. And perhaps you will too.

    What can you do today that will make a difference?

    How can you have more compassion for others?

    How can you bring in laughter?

    Perhaps this is what it’s all about.

    Photo by Bethauthau

  • How Pain from the Past Can Be a Gift in the Present

    How Pain from the Past Can Be a Gift in the Present

    “When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” ~Unknown

    Don’t hate your past. No matter what it contained or what it did to you, the past shapes who you are, not just for the things you felt damaged you but for the lessons you can take from it.

    I love working with the people I call the world shakers. They’re the people who want to make a difference in the world so that they leave it in a slightly better way than they found it.

    I love these types of people because they’re so driven by their heart and passion for others. They’re kind. They value people.

    You know what else these people have in common? They have empathy for others and a desire to make the world a better place. Not in a showy, “give me the Nobel Peace Prize” kind of way (although a bit more showy-ness wouldn’t go amiss!) but in a gentle, modest way.

    Do you know what really amazes and inspires me about world shakers? They’ve had their own hurts, challenges, and heartbreaks but instead of letting those things harden them and make them brittle, they’ve allowed themselves to stay open and vulnerable.

    They’ve taken those things that have wounded, battered, and pierced them and transformed the experiences into fierce empathy for others.

    They can’t walk past the person who’s struggling because they know how it feels to struggle. They have a way of recognizing the human condition in all of us.

    They turn it outward and use it as a learning experience, one that enhances their ability to empathize and drives their conviction to change things for others.

    It could be the mother who refuses to pass on the cycle of abuse she experienced to her own kids, or the teacher who bans the world “stupid” from her classroom because she can remember how much it crippled her to hear it as a child.

    It could be the man who gives coffee to the homeless guy every day because he can knows what it’s like to feel like no one cares about you, or the recovering addict who works with troubled teens to try and save them the pain of his experiences.

    World shaking is often driven by a need to make things better because of the pain we’ve suffered ourselves. 

    Still, I still have to catch myself when I bemoan the things that have happened to me over the years. Like everyone, I’ve had my share of unpleasant, difficult, and down right heart breaking experiences.

    For the longest time I was angry at the world because I’d experienced them. I hated the mistakes I made. I berated myself for my screw-ups and stupid choices. I felt defined by them—embarrassed and soiled—like I should be wearing a T-Shirt with the words “Damaged Goods” on it.

    One day, a very wise person said these words to me:

    Everything that has ever happened to you is the perfect preparation for the person you’re destined to become.

    And everything flipped.

    Those things that I had regretted so much had shaped me. What’s more, I had a choice in it. I had inadvertently used those things that had happened to me as things that drove me forward. Many of the things I’d become interested in, my passions, and my values were driven by those very experiences.

    I’m a passionate advocate for reducing the stigma associated with mental health issues, and I started my whole journey of learning about personal development and emotional resilience because of my own battles with stress-related illness.

    I help people find joy, passion, and a sense of purpose at work and that’s undoubtedly because I spent so many years in jobs that didn’t suit or that where I didn’t feel I was making a difference.

    I’ve also struggled in jobs that really did suit me because I didn’t know how to handle the stresses and challenges our work can bring. I didn’t understand the importance of asking for help, having strong support networks, actively managing stress, and making sure I wasn’t mentally giving myself a hard time too often.

    Having to take a break due to burn out and stress felt horrible at the time it happened to me. But during that time out I studied, trained, and read—a lot!

    I realized that resilience is a practice, not some innate skill that you either have or you don’t. I learned how to develop my own resilience and that made me immensely driven to help others do it, too.

    My dark times also forged my sense of empathy, a key skill I bring to my work. If I’d had the “charmed” life I’d originally wanted, would this have been the case? Somehow I doubt it.

    All of the lessons I’ve learned led to wisdom that can only be gained through experiencing life’s ups and downs.

    Hard lessons learned are deep lessons. They shape us. Most of us are familiar with the term post-traumatic stress, but did you know there is also a phenomenon called post-traumatic growth?

    It’s the ability to grow through adversity—to come out the other end stronger, clearer, and with a renewed zest for life.

    I think that’s what many of us fail to recognize in ourselves, that those dark times, far from diminishing us, can give us the most profound of gifts—the gift of recognizing human life in all its messy, painful, courageous glory.

    We can take those gifts and use them to be a beacon to others to say, “It’s okay. I’ve been there. This too will pass.”

    And that surely is a real gift worth giving.

  • The 3 Most Important Questions to Ask Yourself Every Day

    The 3 Most Important Questions to Ask Yourself Every Day

    “At the end of life, our questions are very simple: Did I live fully? Did I love well?” ~Jack Kornfield

    When I was seven years old, I almost died.

    My family and I were at Central Station in Sydney, Australia to celebrate the last steam train to ever depart the station.

    It was about eight at night, and I remember it so clearly.

    The train was stationary at the platform, about to depart. I heard the whistle from the engine as the wheels started to chug and move ever so slowly.

    My older brother and I were excited, and we decided that it would be a great idea to race the train. We told mum and dad, and they mentioned that they would meet us at the car outside afterward.

    The train started picking up some speed, so my brother and I started to jog beside it. Before we knew it, we were running. Shortly after that, we were sprinting.

    I remember ever so clearly watching the train as I was running along the platform. The carriages were a dark brown wooden color, and some of the windows were open. I remember one of the doors at the end of a carriage clanging open and shut with each jolt of the train.

    Then, I was out.

    The next thing I knew, I was huddled up in a crouched position with the wheels of the train literally centimeters from my face. I noticed that I was leaning hard against something firm. Then I realized it was the platform.

    I had somehow fallen in the gap between the platform and the train.

    I thought to myself, “How did I end up here?”

    The wheels continued to roll past me, and I could feel the breeze like it was trying to suck me in. I crouched there, staring at the end of the train, waiting for it to finally pass me by.

    After what seemed to be an eternity, the train finally moved past me and I was left there, crouching in the open with everything around me starting to go quiet.

    I quickly stood up and turned to the platform to see an older lady sitting on a bench, hands cupped around her mouth and eyes wide open. She was completely in shock.

    Before I knew it, my brother was with me and he pulled me up from the tracks onto the platform.

    He put his arm around me as started to move hastily back to my parents. However, he quickly removed his arm from around me and I noticed it had blood all over it. I realized I was bleeding heavily from the head.

    My parents were back at the car, and as we raced toward them they looked a little confused, not sure why I was crying and why my brother looked shocked. My brother started speaking really fast:

    “We were racing the train, and I was ahead of Brendan. I was getting toward the end of the platform so I stopped, and Brendan just ran into me! He went rolling along the platform and hit his head on the train and fell next to the tracks!”

    We rushed to hospital and got everything sorted. I was extremely lucky. The doctor mentioned that if it were an electric train I would have most likely died.

    As I went through this experience, I had a number of thoughts running through my head. Am I going to die? Do I have brain damage? Am I still going to be able to do the things I want to do?

    I then had some more thoughts that really hit me harder. What have I done in my life? Have I told everyone how much I love them? Has my life even mattered?

    I was only seven years old, but these thoughts and this experience had a profound impact on the way I conducted my life from then onward.

    I realized that I was blessed to have a second chance at life. I wanted to make sure that my life did matter. I wanted to make sure that I did achieve something and that I did tell those closest to me that I love them.

    I started focusing on my own personal development. Throughout school I was determined to get good grades and perform well at sports, as to me, this was success. I was always fascinated by the mind and throughout these years had a dream of running my own business, training people on human behavior and performance.

    However, I took on the advice of my parents and of society in general and ended up taking a safe job in the corporate world.

    There were so many days while working in the organization where I asked myself, “Am I really making a difference?” and “Am I living fully?” And you know what? I wasn’t happy with my answer.

    As the days went by and I asked myself these questions, I realized that I needed to make a change and make good on the promise I made to myself when I was seven years old.

    Although not an easy step, I have since left the corporate world and have a feeling of living more fully, making more of a difference, and loving more openly in this world. I’m proud of that.

    These are questions I still live by today and they guide me in everything I do. I believe they are the questions that everyone will ask when they are near the end of their time, and I encourage you to consider these questions today and regularly moving forward.

    Have you loved fully?

    I believe that the people in your life are the most important thing to your happiness, well-being, and your ability to cope through change in life. It is the people in your life that have made you who you are today.

    Don’t be afraid to tell those closest to you how much they mean to you. The more love and appreciation you show to others, the more love and appreciation you will get in return, compounding its positive effect on your life and on those around you.

    Have you lived fully?

    I believe that we all have the strength and ability to do the things that matter most to us, every single day.

    Don’t be afraid to do the things that you want to do. Take risks and live your life how you have always dreamed it to be.

    It can be challenging to do so, but with careful planning, support, and some steps in the right direction, you will be able to live more fully in the way you desire. Experience life in all it has to offer. Take challenges, expand your comfort zone, and be the best you can be in this world.

    Have you made a difference?

    I believe that we are all here to make a difference in this world.

    I believe that we all have something—be it wisdom, wealth, or love—that we can share with those around us.

    Don’t be afraid to stand up for what you believe in and don’t be afraid to make yourself vulnerable. It’s this vulnerability that enables you to be who you truly are and demonstrate to the world what you believe in. There are others in this world that can benefit from what you can do or what you have to say.

    Life is an amazing journey in which we are here to make a difference and support one another.

    You don’t need to wait for a near-death experience to realize this. You can ask yourself these questions now. I can certainly say it’s worth it.

  • 25 Ways to Make a Difference in the World Every Day

    25 Ways to Make a Difference in the World Every Day

    “The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to appear.” ~Socrates

    When I started Tiny Buddha, my main goal was to make a positive difference. I think that’s a goal many of us share.

    I’ve stumbled upon countless blog and books written by people who say their purpose in life is to help people.

    I suspect it’s how most of us infuse our lives with meaning: trying to somehow leave the world a better place than we found it.

    I recently read a somewhat old blog post by ex-Microsoft employee Scott Berkun that got me thinking about this collective fascination with making a difference in the world. He wrote:

    “We rarely need big things. As soon as someone starts talking about changing the world or radically reinventing something odds are good he’s talking from his ego, not his heart. Unless he’s working on bringing safety to the scared, health to the sick, or opportunity to the poor, the reinvention serves a want (or an ego), not a need.”

    He went to explain how on his last day at Microsoft, he gave a lecture and one of his colleagues thanked him for the first time, saying he’d never expressed his admiration before because he assumed it was apparent. According to Scott:

    “…it takes a better man to acknowledge goodness in others than it does to merely be good oneself. Anyone can criticize or accept praise, but initiating a positive exchange is a hallmark of a difference maker.”

    What a beautiful idea. I couldn’t agree more. (more…)

  • You May Have a Super Power You Never Knew You Had

    You May Have a Super Power You Never Knew You Had

    Not sure you have a gift or anything special to offer humanity? After watching this you may have a whole new perspective on how you make a difference.

  • You Can Make a Difference: Just Open Your Eyes

    You Can Make a Difference: Just Open Your Eyes

    See the World

    “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” ~William James

    My mind wasn’t able to percieve the reality around me. It had been ten days since I’d woken up with a feeling of constant energy flowing through my whole body.

    It was so intense that I didn’t want to let it go. But I wasn’t ready for it. It was way too much for my unprepared body and mind. I didn’t even know what it was back then.

    Everything had happened so fast. I was on the way to Chicago with my friends after seeming to check out mentally. They wanted to help me by bringing me to a clinic, but the fear was stronger.

    Suddenly it grabbed me and made me jump out of the car. I started running in the opposite direction. Then I saw the fast moving vehicle coming…

    The highway was dark and cold. My body was lying down on the pavement and I was looking at it from above. My friends were crying around it, and I left the world.

    In the next moment I had reached my final destination, the place of pure love, bliss, and unity with all that exists. The place that we can not even explain with our limited-by-the-physical-reality minds. The place where we are all one.

    Then I felt a mighty force that drew me back.

    There was a light in the tunnel, with thousands of small episodes of my previous life on the walls. Tiny memories of who I was before leaving the world of forms as we know it.

    It was so beautiful. Then I got back into my physical body and opened my eyes. The pain was incredible, yet somehow distant. I was in a fast moving ambulance on the way to Springfield, Illinois.

    “What am I doing back here?” was my first conscious thought.

    I had no memories at all. I was all wiped out, like a brand new hard drive that just came out of the factory. I learned that some of my forehead was missing and my right knee was smashed.

    Doctors told my parents and my friends that I wouldn’t make it. I disagreed. I love this beautiful life too much to leave it.

    Four hours with a great team of surgeons followed, and another trip back to this unexplainable place beyond the perception of our minds. And again, there was this force that needed to send me back to Earth, as I didn’t really want to leave.

    A huge smile on my face. My first titanium peace was on. “Yeah! I’ll be like Ironman,” were my words before going in for surgery. I will never forget the look on the surgeon’s face after he heard that.

    It was quite funny not to know what to do with the spoon the nurse gave me for my first meal after the operation. She showed me how to hold it. Everything was so delicious.

    Miracles occurred. The doctors couldn’t believe I was so happy and smiling so widely.

    Then my parents came and the doctors let me go after a few consultations with the psychiatric department. My mind was clear like never before. This was one of my gifts, along with the energy that was, and still is, inside of me.

    I was passing twenty miles a day on my bike two weeks after the accident, doing hundreds of pushups and pull-ups afterwards. The energy inside my body was so incredibly powerful that I simply had to use it.

    My memories were coming back slowly. With every passing day I was putting more and more of them together—and I’m still remembering today.

    I received more than seventy thousand dollars worth of bills in the mail. Still, there was a smile on my face. I knew my only choice was bankruptcy, but I didn’t let it get me down—I was starting over.

    I’ve learned that even when things seem impossible, there is always a way. When there is a will, there is a way. We just need to let go of the fears that keep us stuck. Fear doesn’t serve us. It limits us and prevents us from reaching our full potential. 

    My heart is still filled with gratitude for all those men and women who took care of my body.

    I sent them my blessings, and then I left. Bye bye US. It was a pleasure. I bought a one-way ticket back to Eastern Europe. Welcome to Bulgaria, the country where I was born. It was almost five years since I had last seen it last. Family and friends met me at the airport with smiles and warm hugs.

    Years of meditation and self-observation followed. I had to find out what exactly happened. And I did.

    I was dwelling on my doubts and losing faith in myself. I wasn’t feeling unity with the people and the world around me. I was crying and giving up sometimes, but rising up again and continuing forward.

    You will most probably feel the same at times.

    We’re all on own unique path to self-realization. It’s a process. But if you keep walking, no matter how slow it appears sometimes, you will reach your destination. Then you can choose your next one and keep going toward it again, far stronger than you were before.

    There was struggling. There was irritation. There was love. There was compassion. There was pain. There were tears. There was laughter. There was pride. There was fear. There was courage. And sometimes it wasn’t so clear.

    It was a snowy Sunday when I went to my first self-development workshop. At the end I had the chance to share part of my story. It was the most satisfying feeling of all. Then everything started falling into place. I knew what I needed to do.

    One morning I started writing. And I wrote and wrote and wrote, day and night. My first book was on the way. It came out one year later.

    In the meantime, I spent hours preparing to be a speaker. Nothing happens without putting in time and effort. There is no shortcut to achieving your goals. You need to work on your skills and develop them as best as you can. And keep doing it after. Every day.

    Workshops followed lectures and speeches. Two blogs in two different languages. A second book, too. Great people, places, and moments of love, abundance, and gratitude.

    But most of all there was belief, a belief in my self. There was a knowing—that I have something unique to share with the world around me.

    And you have too. Yes, I’m talking to you. Don’t look behind your back. I really mean you.

    You are simply amazing. Right here, right now. You have some extraordinary experience you can share with us too. Please do. We all need it.

    We all need you to reach inside yourself, remember your deepest dreams and desires, and share your passion, as life is meant to be shared.

    Many times I thought about how insignificant I am. Have you done the same? It’s a lie that we’ve been told many times. It’s time for it to go away. You don’t need it anymore.

    You are great and you have something important to share. Remember? It comes back slowly, I know. I’ve been there. It takes time to break the program and wipe the slate clean of all the negative beliefs. But it’s worth it, every single moment.

    Are you ready? To see things differently? Just open your eyes.

    Photo by Rareclass

  • Make the Difference: An Inspiring Video about Overcoming Obstacles

    Make the Difference: An Inspiring Video about Overcoming Obstacles

    This is the true story of a group of boys in Thailand who formed a football team in a small floating village without even a tiny bit of dry land. Even though they had nowhere to practice, they found a way to make it happen and became an inspiration to everyone around them.

    What’s the dry land you’ve been looking for, and how can you make the difference you want to make now, whether you find it or not?